Tag Archives: relationships

Six years

15 May

I’ll never forget the moment when Sebastian whispered, “I think I more than like you.” It was the beginning of our relationship, and maybe we didn’t know it at the time, but the beginning of our life together.

I won’t deny that these past six years have been challenging. Normally I’d be writing a post today about our long-distance relationship and why we continue to make it work. But I’m not going to do that. Today, I just want to say that I can’t wait to marry Sebastian and start our life together.

Image via Allison Ewing Photography | www.the-wild-child.com
Six years was worth the wait, but a lifetime with you won’t be nearly enough.

Love you, Basti


image via Allison Ewing Photography

Three years

15 May

Another year spent apart, but another year together. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Many people don’t understand our relationship, and why we choose to make it work, but I’m OK with that. What’s important is he gets me, and I get him. It doesn’t matter if people don’t get us.

I’m reminded every day that we’re 4,206 miles apart, yet he’s the closest person to me. He knows all my secrets, my hopes and my dreams. He knows what makes me laugh and how to push my buttons. He knows my favorite color and my silly routines. He’s seen me at my best, and he’s seen me at my worst. He knows it all, and still chooses to love me for me. I never have to pretend who I am with Sebastian.

So today we celebrate our crazy relationship – the relationship no one else truly gets, but the one we do, and that’s all that really matters.

Basti and Me

Dear Sebastian – you bring more joy to my life than you’ll ever know. Thank you for the most wonderful three years.

Happy Anniversary, love.


Staying connected

18 Jul

When people find out I’m in a long-distance relationship (and have been for a while), they like to ask  how we make our relationship work. My answer is we talk every day. I know, I know –  it’s a no-brainer. But just like any relationship, we put in the effort to communicate with each other.

Our favorite app is WhatsApp, which enables you to message (text) for free. We message each other a couple of times a day just to see what the other person is up to.

I send pictures like this:

And he sends me pictures of his dinner (with his awful phone camera):

Yes, I get it’s silly, but when you never see the other person things like this help you feel connected.

Every night we talk during my drive home to catch up on each other’s day. The time difference is six hours so if Sebastian is tired, the call is short. But it really doesn’t matter how long the call is, the point is we always talk.

We also try to Skype for a couple of hours on the weekends. You probably think we’d run out of things to talk about, but we haven’t yet. We laugh, tell jokes, share videos and articles, talk about our upcoming trips and future goals, and before we know it, three hours have gone by.

Regardless of how often or how long we talk, I think we’ve made it through because we truly care about each other, and we do our best to let the other person know it. Whether it’s sending a quick message to say hey, sending a letter in the mail or staying up late to talk on the phone.

I’m curious though, how do you stay connected in your relationships? I know it’s sometimes easy to take the other person for granted. How do you show you still care?

Finding the can’t-live-without

19 Apr

As I was spring cleaning this month, I came upon a box of my ex-boyfriend’s things – one of them being his high school class ring. In case you’re wondering, I returned the ring. But finding all those old items made me think about our past relationship. I was the one who ended it, and at the time, it was painful. We had been dating for almost four years. To this day, I still couldn’t tell you why the relationship wasn’t working, but the fact is it wasn’t. I realized that even though you care for someone, you can’t stay in a relationship to make the other person happy. You have to be happy yourself.

I recently read an article about things to know in your twenties, and one of the points was this: “Now is also the time to get serious about relationships. And “serious” might mean walking away from a dating relationship that’s good but not great. Some of the most life-shaping decisions you’ll make during this time will be about walking away from good-enough, in search of can’t-live-without. One of the only truly devastating mistakes you can make in this season is staying with the wrong person even though you know he or she is the wrong person. It’s not fair to that person, and it’s not fair to you.”

I found myself in this situation with my ex. Now, I don’t want to give the wrong impression. Things didn’t end because he wasn’t “good-enough” for me. He’s a good guy, and he’ll make one girl really happy someday. I didn’t end it because of who he was; I walked away because of how I felt in the relationship. The longer we were together, the more things began to change. Sometimes you grow together, and sometimes you grow apart. It came to the point where I was just going through the motions, and I finally had to stop. It wasn’t fair to him and it wasn’t fair to me.

So our relationship ended, and although it hurt at the time, I will always feel that it was the best decision for both of us.

As I moved on from the breakup, something crazy and wonderful happened. I fell in love with a boy from Germany, and we’ve been happily dating for almost two years. While this long-distance relationship is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, it’s also one of the greatest. I wouldn’t do this with anyone else.

Don’t stay in a relationship because it’s comfortable or because you can’t pinpoint what’s wrong. Hearts will heal, and you’ll open yourself to finding the can’t-live-without. Trust me – you want to find the can’t-live-without.

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